"Creative Monster" by Tammy Solis

Long ago when I was a young child in the third grade, I had suffered a learning disability. I would have to move to the back of the classroom with a teacher assistant to learn how to read. That very same teacher assistant had told me “her two year old granddaughter had read better than me”. That had made me feel at that moment, horrible, stupid, and dumb, I wanted to cry; I wanted to run away, I never wanted to go back to school. I never wanted to pick up a book and read again. Reading and writing was very challenging for me.

I went on with my life remembering that person, sitting at the table beside me. I was trying to read “dick and Jane” I remember that old smelly book. I remember the bold black font and red lettering in that book. Most of all I remember trying to sound out the words in that book. I was unable to sound out the words. Everything looked foreign to me. I could not understand what I was doing wrong. I could remember, not knowing what was expected of me, or what I was supposed to do. I could not understand why, I was unable to read like the other girls and boys in my class. It was the longest thirty minutes I ever had, sitting next to that teacher assistant in reading class. I could feel her frustration in her voice. The whole situation was uncomfortable experience. I could remember it was hard for me to learn until I wanted to learn, I needed to learn to survive.

Little after that my family and I stated to attending church and having bible study in our home we had to read aloud in front of the whole group. Eventually I learned how to read at a fifth grade level, just enough to get through school I was a student who was passed on grade to grade. I eventually dropped out of high school in the twelfth grade. Because of a disability, I have ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder). I kept on reading I started with newspaper, I eventually was able to read to my two toddlers. I wanted to be a good role model to my two girls. I started to study for the G.E.D. test. My reading skills increased. I later received my G.E.D.

Now at thirty- seven years old, single mother of three, I have to keep up with my children. I am currently a student at Metropolitan State of Denver. I have all ways had an interest in Higher Education. I wanted to graduate from college with degrees, in U. S. A. Government, and Law. I am currently working on a degree in criminal justice. I have all ways like being in school. I have a passion for knowledge and education. I have strength and weakness in some academic subjects. I can overcome all weakness by working and studying harder. With my personality nothing can keep me from achieving my dreams or the goals, I set forth myself.

I may remember what that teacher assistant had told me, as if it was just today. It had bothered me for a long time that someone in that authority would say such hurtful words to a child with a disability, and showed such frustration. All that is all behind me now; I am a better reader now, than a writer. However, I am working on my writing skills; I am attending English and math at Community College of Denver. I have a grade point average of three point one four for spring two thousand and ten. I am working on a four point zero this summer semester of two thousand and ten. If it was not for that teacher assistant to be little me the way she did, I would have not have been as motivated as I am today to receive a college degree. I have a goal that I will achieve by graduating and receiving a degree in law.

Now that I put my thoughts and feelings about that teacher assistant on paper, I can move past those old feelings I have for reading. I have noticed if I am interested, in what I am reading I can finish a book. I have never completed a book, until last semester in history. I enjoy reading about things that I am interested in now, other than textbooks I have to read for school. I have a strong belief that I can do whatever I want and I can achieve any desire I have.