"You're Not Gay, Are You?" by Audra Boykin

“No, really! She asked me out…”

“Are you sure? What exactly did she say?”

“Well, I have the text; you can read it if you don’t believe me…”

The text, “ Hey, saw you at Pride. Your friend gave me your number and so I was wondering if you would like to go out tonight…that is if you’re not busy. Call me or text me back N.T.K.S. (need to know soon) Till then, thinking of you. Jen.”

“OMG!! So, what are you going to say. I mean, you’re not even gay! Are you? Oh my God!!! Kell, are you serious? For how long?”

“What does it matter? Think about it. When’s the last time you saw me with a guy? Yeah, it’s been that long.”

“Holly crap Kelly! You could have said something, I am your best friend aren’t I?

“Yes, but I didn’t want you to think that I liked you that way and I didn’t want to lose you as a friend, so that’s why I didn’t say anything. Besides you’re always saying fucked up shit about gays and I thought you’d go off the deep end.”

“I am so sorry Kell, I would never in a million years, I mean if I’d known you were gay. All that stuff I said, please forgive me.”

“What do you want me to say, that it’s just water under the bridge and don’t ever say that stuff ever again. I don’t know Andie, you said that you hated anyone that was gay and now that you know that I dig chicks, it’s all good. That sounds a little funky to me.”

“But Kelly, come on. We’ve been friends forever.”

“Yes and you’ve always been just a little more prejudice than I like…and now that I’ve shown you this side of me and took you to Pride, I don’t know if our friendship can make it through…and before you start in on me about my mom, she knows and has been there for me when you have been breaking my heart for a long time…”

“I don’t believe this. You always laughed at my jokes; you’ve never told me to stop or that I was hurting you.”

“Yeah, in fear that you would start cracking jokes about me being gay or that you would tell everyone at school, or anywhere else for that matter, that I was gay! And I said Yes; I’m going on this date! And if I hear one word about me or my lifestyle at school or work I will not forgive you or keep this friendship alive! You know, my mom thought I was crazy when I told her I was taking you to Pride, but I thought if you could see us in action and in love with life that maybe I could ‘Come Out’ to you and you would still be my friend. But you said such awful things yesterday…”

“Yes, I did say awful thing yesterday and I am ashamed of that and I know this is going to sound very hypocritical…but I am sorry for hurting you and I’ll do whatever you want me to do to prove that to you.”

“Do you honestly mean that?”

“Yes, I do because I love you. Kelly, you are the sister I never got. Brothers suck and you’re the only one I can talk to about them. Plus, who’s going to help you pick out what you’re going to wear tonight!!! Kelly, I will never say another mean hurtful thing about anyone ever again, I promise!”

“I’m going to keep my eye on you and I love you to Andie. Please don’t make me regret this. I don’t want a new best friend, I want you!”